Mid Week WedNesday

Time flies.. its almost coming to the weekend. Time seems to be never enuf. We seem to forever be blaming time.. not enough time=stress, too much time=bored, just enough time=still want more of it.. cos humans can be NEVER satisfied.. can we??

Just had tutorial at school. I ended at 10. So did the cleaner uncle at school. He was drinking hot lipton tea and chatting with the other cleaner lady. He looked tired from so many years of hard work.. he conversed in hokkien, telling the cleaner lady about unfairness.. probably politics at work. Politics is everywhere... work, friends,family... its scary. Individual thinks differently, the way we communicate causes many misinterpretation and end up misunderstandings occur. Maybe its our mood, our tone, our body language... everything plays a part.. yet all these politics are like killer virus.. unable to cure completely. Sigh.... Anyways, stop drifting away, i felt guilty, upset..etc.. mixed up after seeing the uncle and auntie in school. I think i never contribute to the society enough, i havent done much for people. Though i work in the hospital, i think i maybe do not provide enough or good enough help to service the patients. I am really upset with myself. So moody.

Today is a day full of thoughts.. full of negative thoughts... for i cannot think of anything good about me.

I think i am an average student, or maybe a little above average, or trying to outplay school and work too much that i am neither here nor there. M i plain stupid or plain lazy or both or cant be bothered or wasting money or what??? Is there a place for me to excel? to fulfill a lil more?I have no motivation to work harder.. try harder.. i make myself feel better by telling myself that i am balancing work and school and life. Its just hard to keep all 3 balanced!

There is this star award, gold award and silver award happening in the clinic. I thought about it, about how staff got their awards.. its purely favourtism from the clinic manger plus fakely orcing patients to write in good feedback and acting busy while not doing anything productive. Fuck tt. Seriously, these awards are so fake... scary how people out there try so hard to please their superiors and pretend and act some more and fake even more.... screw those Fake Fuckers!

Good Nite all..

Weekend has come by and gone.. its the nite fall once again and back to routine boring work week starting tomorrow morning. Big Big Sighs...
Anyhow, I opened up the parcel.. not waiting for 13th to arrive, n there you go.. a whole bundle of surprises! haha.. fish eye 2 and the coloured films and the coloured flash changer! Yeah.. so so happy.. thanks dd.. wink wink* ....


Hee... close up look..


Obviously, the rascals heck care what is inside the parcel.. all they want is to make the new box their latest toy.. in and out of the box and fighting each other... haha...

Grooming day! Time to torture/pamper the 2 of them.. brought them to holland for basic grooming.. nails ears belly .. total wash up plus spray of perfum!! hmmm.... nice n clean... for A DaY at least.

While i waited for them.. i spent my time getting some household thingys.. a new shower head .. new light bulbs... Shopping at vivo city.. its bad to shop.. make you spend and spend and feel guilty not spending.. feel guilty after spending. It totally Sucks... haha

Tangs at Vivo (Fitting room)

After Picking the rascals.. headed hm to do some changes... change of lights.. change of shower head.. trying my best to clean up my room... but as always failed to clear the messy mess!

Nite falls... loner lil jj didnt know what to do.. so.. after some thought.. i went out. Settled my dinner at TCC gallery at boat quay. I always pass by there but never been up there. Its actually quite a nice place to hang out with many friends all together.. unlike the usual TCC outlets.

That above was my dinner.. Banana Salmon medium done with mash below...

Want some?? cos i couldnt finish the whole piece....

After TCC, isabel ivan and me went down to dempsey.. for drinks.. Ended up not so much of drinking.. but food tasting!!

They serve yummy sausages


This below is Sinful.. couldnt resist not ordering upon seeing the picture. Once you start, you cant stop.. and the waiter even packed it into the container for those that we couldnt finish. haha.. nice nice!!

Above: Ivan, JJ, Isabella

Spencer and Ivan in the pic above

View from our table... not too bad yea? ...

Next stop: Party World Orchard....

It was isabel first time in singapore KTV... she liked it... Wanna be a singer she said!

Yawn yawn yawn.... either i am getting old or something, i cant seem to stay up late anymore.. At 4am.. i was like really exhausted! damn... system cant function like the youngsters no more.

Okie.. tts my update for saturday the 7th-8th of june 08....

TATAzzz

TGIF

Today i woke up with stiff neck.. but wats new?!?! i am not sure if its my lousy bed or my non useful support pillow tt is giving me problems..But i have a major stiff neck problem tt requires regular hard massages! tts how server it is... sigh

So the day began quite slow.. the usual eye checkings that stacks up.. until 1245pm .. it finally slowed down. Lazy afternoon with nothing much.. basically checking airfares and nice resorts in asia. I jus wanna travel with u dd... lets go away.... oh wells, me day dreaming away... .... xxxx


I m kinda slow.. but i finally went to watch Indiana Jones.. i love tt from young.. n watching it was really good. I heard many reviews tt were quite negative.. but isabel and me both agreed that it was overall a really GooD Movie to catch. HAahaa.. next up is KongFu Panda on Sunday with the kiddos.... hope it will be a good movie too xxxx


Going orchard is a horrible decision thou.. i spent quite a fair bit of time deciding on cinema this noon, whether to go cathay or Gv or Shaw... i chose orchard cathay in the end.. so ... shop shop shop as usual.. what else to do in orchard but eat n shop.. therefore... i spent money again... quite a bit... feeling the pinch now.. but couldnt resist the last piece n display.. xxxx

Brought isabel to ding tai fung.. cos she havent eaten there b4... i took pics of apetitizer n the Xiao Long Bao... but chit chat till i forgot to take our Dan CHow Fan! haha.... After which we went to Sony to try fix back my lil missin Q on the keypad.. no spare parts available and if i do change the whole damn thing.. it will cost me money.. hmm.. just hope spare Q is available.. i will only know on tuesday.. fingers crossed xxxx

Oh.. the highlight for today is my Parcel received.. hee... i didnt want to open it yet cos its meant to be a gift for 13th this month... YEt, the parcel details on the box gave it away.. Something i wanted for some time..Me so happy.. thanks DD.. u shouldnt have wasted yr money.. But i Love the prezziez... muahahahahaha.....

Good Nite DD.. cant sleep without hearing your voice..i cant imagine another 2 over months not seeing u.. i m tryin to think of a way but all the constraints.. argh! ... xxxx

OHwells, its the freaking weekend.. enjoys ppl.....

wtf

Today not much of updates.. had a moody day basically. No mood for anything..
Morning was rather busy, as usual.. who but me myself to get all the shit done. I really startin to get more and more annoyed with the rules n routines of my clinic. Afternoon was jus mood swings plus swining and swing swing. But at the very least, i got my late hand in tutorial done. One load off my busy buzziness..

Today i as warned no sandals to work. All the allied health doesnt wear all round covered shoes. Y just pin point me? Mine are pretty sandals?! and the fact is i do not just wear sandals everyday.. i do change..sometimes covered.. sometimes half covered..occasional heels.. a variety u know?! so wtf? i am not under customer service nor am i a counter staff.. i m OPTOMETRIST. The clinic manager has nothing better to do but looking at my feet? f. tt. Now they are asking for medical prove to certify that i am not able to put on covered shoes everyday.. so fine, i will get that done tomorrow to fucking shut their mouth brain ass. xxxxx

Nite came.. and guess wat?! rules n regulations in my own home. I seriously wish i can fuck all these bullshit and have a place of my own. Total Unfairness. Even parking of 3 bloody cars need to be in order..in the compound of my own home.. how crap is tt? who the f. look at the 3 pathetic cars? U mean someone is ineterested to see how my CeFIRO is parked in my carpark? dude, i am sure you have better things to manage than own cars in own home rite?! my.... so so pissed! xxxxx

Fuck the big area which has so lil privacy and space, fuck the old slow car that drinks petrol like water consumption, fuck their childish and selfish mentality.

I have attitude problem. I have some serious mental illness. What else that i have that i am not aware of?

Help me get out of here. All i wan is a space that i can freely move about, let my rascals live in peace, let my heart stop aching, my brain stop hurting, my eyes stop being sore. Pls help me.

Good nite to all. peace love hugs xxxxx

screamin in sadness

Too tired too angry too everythin. Bad nite it has been.. jj very upset.
Volcano erupted!
anyhows.. when is life EveR FaiR?! i m sure i will have fairness in other sense.. rite?
Pls dun leave me alone.
Y ppl out there have parents that tries to create fairness yet mine leaves me hangin to rot?
Y have me if u didnt want me? thats a question tt is forever lingering in my head.
Too weak to think about anythin now.. but my heart is crying..screaming..
Is there anyone Out There who can hear/feel/care for jj??
oh wells.. its the start of a brand new day.. cant wait to get this feeling over n hopefully done with.
Till tomorrow, good nites.